Starbucks Thoughts #1

My footprints say I need you but my hands can't shake the emptiness, because those words that I clung to were never meant for me, they weren't yours to say, it's a puzzle that we were never apart of. My solutions can't piece together this riddle, I'm just stuck with loose ends and a blank stare. This isn't the life I foresaw when I looked into your eyes, your honest eyes, that only say lies in my vulnerability, a confession you couldn't keep. I'm not sure how to face you, when I'm not sure which face I'm facing, because after all, there's no footprints on cloud 9.

Game Changer

Adele is someone I recently got into and now I can't imagine how my life was before her music, she's a real game changer and a positive influence on where music is going!

At a crossroad with nowhere to go

Ever find yourself at a point of your life where you just don't know what you're supposed to do, well that's where I'm at right now. The difficulty for me though is that I'm not sure what is the best decision that I could live with and have the fewest regrets. Now, I don't believe in having regrets, because I feel that they just eat at you and have no further use other than to make you feel bad about yourself, maybe to teach you something, but I think accepting and acknowledging your wrongs is similar and effective without having that guilt lingering in every decision.  But what if something feels like the right choice to you, but is wrong to everyone else around you, what do you do then? that's where I am at right now, if what i want really is what i want, or is it something that someone else wants and I think its something I SHOULD want. Don't get me wrong I have amazing people in my life that I really respect and admire, but at the same time, I can't help but feel that something is off. This feeling I get messes with my logic, because logically I should want to do what I love, but when there is a barrier between what I love and what I should love, I have trouble seeing where I am supposed to go. The kicker to this internal conflict is that there as some things that are out of my control. That's a scary thing isn't it? to accept that something in your life you don't have a say, at least that scares me. There are some areas that I need to give to the universe because as much as I scramble to find answers elsewhere and inside of me and with whatever information I do have, I can't find them, and I can't change how things are. This puts even more pressure onto this crossroad of my life, because as much as I want to go onto this path I have been building since I could remember, I find that I keep looking back at that feeling I get and every time I do I feel anchored to being in limbo, So maybe the only thing I can do is wait until something pushes me into a direction, and for this lingering feeling to disappear

-Juice

Everything Happens For A Reason

I'd be lying if I said I didn't believe in Karma, because I see how it spreads in people's lives everyday, you do something bad, bad comes back to you, if you do something good, good comes back to you. Because to me it would be ignorant to think that every action doesn't have a reaction. But don't get me wrong, sometimes you need that bad karma to come back to you because sometimes it starts the chain reaction to something greater in your life, because everything happens for a reason. Most people look at me like I have two heads when I tell them that, but I know thats only because its hard to accept, because really, who wants to accept that something bad happened to them for a reason. Funny how we only focus on the bad, no one seems to notice when something good happens, maybe because we're so used to seeing the faults in things that the good often falls to the way side. But ayways before I go on another thought! I need to finish this one. Now to those who are reading this that are annoyed at me already because they don't think they deserve the bad things that happen to them let me apologise and explain before you get all mad and carelessy rant against me. I'm not justifying all the bad things that have happend to you or anyone, nor am I promoting anyone to go and make others suffer just to please themselves, believe me, I am in no way promoting careless reasoning for someone else to do something reckless that can cause pain to another or affect others and anything negative. I am simply suggesting a perpective, it is in your power what you do and don't do with it after you read this, I have no control of your actions, which I am perfectly ok with because I would never want to be someones only thought pattern. Now, lets try this again, I believe strongly that we are powerful beings, not just with what we have accomplished, but in many ways that I shall most likely get back to on another blog. But we rarely acknowledge our influence on things, animals and people. Which is how we have modified ourselves, we don't need to feel the need to feel responsible if we give ourselves reason not ot, following me so far? Good! if not, I'll try to explain it better now. I'll give you an example from my own life, a family member of mine went to buy wood on a thursday at Rona to build something at their home, now if you live in my area you know that on saturday it is 15% off of anything you buy, but ONLY on saturday that is coming up, my family member didn't like this, they wanted their 15% on Thursday, well, they told them no, so to cut out the unnesserary extra details i'll just say the cashier asked if they had four boards and they said yes, knowing they infact had fve. Now we all know that, that, was wrong, but they justifed it with that they felt they DESERVED their 15% NOW, now again i'll touch on another blog to discuss justification, but anyways you can see from this simple example that people find excuses to make some of the things they do, justified. Now why is this important? well people go and do things such as this, and one day when tehy are at their job they are going to encounter someone just as pushy and think "hey doesn't this person get that i'm jsut doing my job, i'm not getting fired just so this guy can save five dollars" but they will somehow, jusitify whatever they end up getting away with because they feel they DESERVE it. Now do you have a better idea of what i'm talking about? Good! So at the end of the day do you feel you DESERVE to be treated like that? NOOO, then why are you treating others like that? OOOO this is when the bulb is supposed to click on for those just warming up to the concept. Let this ferment in your brain for a little while and look out for Everything Happens For A Reason Part Two!

-Juice

CANOE -- CNEWS: Cute Animal Pictures

CANOE -- CNEWS: Cute Animal Pictures

Security Blanket

Sometimes when you think things are over and are out of your life somehow fate finds a way to drop them back in your life. And the reasons are never clear, and you keep wondering why God why would you do this to me! Well I was thinking maybe its time that you can finally be on the same page as the person, or they need to teach you something or the universe just likes messing with you, I'm kind've leaning towards the last one with the universe. I thought the whole point of things ending were because they were supposed to end, but I'm pretty sure the universe has other plans that don't always make sense at the time, which really sucks 'cause you don't know what you're supposed to do, and for me I have a tendency to run, run far away and don't look back! but I know that, that is wrong, because you can't deal with things if you run, but if you don't have the answer what good are you to who is asking.  Thats when you gotta really look at things without all those outside influences of what your friends or family are telling you, you gotta be a little selfish and put on some blinders, 'cause you are the one that has to live with it, so you can't live for others, you gotta live for yourself. I'm not saying its wrong to totally ignore people, what I'm saying is listen to their point of view, discuss, than make your own decision, because at the end of the day, you are stuck with your thoughts and yourself, and if you don;t take into account how you feel and what you want, you will always regret it.  But its really hard I can't lie, when you have something so familiar and your given the choice between it and something new, 'cause this familiar thing or person you know, they know you, you know how they work and they get you, but this new person, you have no clue! They may not get you like the other person did, they don't have your history, your past, but they do have something else, they have potential, possibility, a new world and identity that could fail, but could be amazing, but no one wants to let go of that security blanket, 'cause its all you know, and if we could hold it while exploring a new world we would, but we can't. We need a rock to deep us grounded rather than a blanket to hide the world, 'cause the blanket may hide you, but it doesn't make things go away, it just hides your sight of it, but a rock is there open and clear and won't budge. So maybe its time to put down the blanket and explore the mountains.

-Juice

Thoughts I

I know it's cliché to say appreciate those you love because you never know what could happen, but it really is true! If i've learned anything you gotta value those strong people in your lives because who knows! the next day something could happen and you will have that sitting regret that you never did anything to show how much you really cared about them. Take this weekend, I spent it with some close friends of mine and a few people I haven't seen in years! but they still came out regardless and we had a blast! Played dance central which for those who haven't played it you gotta get on that! its amazing! went to a local pub and caught the UFC fight, which I don't really like violence but the conversations we were having with people about it were priceless and we watched some amazing Karaoke! for some people it would be a lame weekend but we genuinely had an amazing time! we shared some hilarious stories, met some wild characters, have pictures that will forever be an inside joke, and just got closer with people we never thought we would.  What I'm trying to stress here is that i've had people in my life that I could never see my life without, they fit so perfectly and everything was amazing, and it ended up turning for the worst, some cases see once in awhile some worse ones I haven't talked to since, but that point is, I never had any regrets of the times we shared together. Of course I do miss them in my life, I have new people who have the same insecurities as I do, same sense of humour, same thrive for life and most of all, care genuinely about me and my well being, and for those who are reading and are thinking, what the hell is that supposed to mean??  Think back to yourself and the people that have been the most positively influential to you and remember al the things they did for you not to gain something, not because they owed you something, but because they want you to have what you deserve which in their eyes is only the best.  So approach those people who really really really look out for you and buy them coffee, or pay for their movie ticket or even I don't know tell them how amazing they are! because they could be gone and all you will be left with are what ifs


-Juice